23 February 2010

Spy Cam 2.0

Rumour has it that just prior to he 2000 Summer Olympics, the City of Sydney cleaned up the streets by giving all the homeless people, drunks, and nut-jobs one way bus tickets to the Gold Coast (Australia's version of Fort Lauderdale).  Evidently, they have finally made their way back to Sydney, for I have noticed a marked increase in the number of foul-smelling, disheveled, and mentally displaced individuals roaming the streets and parks of the city.

I am an absolute magnet for such people.  There is something about my face that says "Come, talk to me!" - possibly it is because I am usually staring at them in wide eyed wonder.  Only recently have I begun to master the art of evasion while still managing to make a personal study of them.

Unfortunately, I was not swift enough to get a picture of the completely feral schizophrenic that lately haunts the bus stop at Town Hall Station as he bent over into an empty rubbish bin...partly because I am genuinely scared of him and do not ever want to be the object of his fearsome focus. 

However, I was able to capture a (blurry) snap of this pungent character.  He was draped in an American Flag with a New England Patriots T-Shirt looped over his neck.  He also carried with him a small and impeccably clean crocheted blanket and entertained himself by showing a blank peice of paper to pretty girls.  Somehow, I managed to avoid his attentions.

21 February 2010

Spy Cam 1.0 - Good Mornin' Little School Girl

I rarely talk on my phone.  I type on it a lot, and since discovering it had musical capabilities, I often pretend it is an iPod.  In fact, I even call it an iPod (I can hear people in England wincing.)  I frequently use my phone to convert temperatures and distances into recognizable digits.  Sometimes, I use it as a paper weight.

I recently discovered that my phone is also a camera - albeit, not a very good one.  But a camera phone does have the distinct advantage of being somewhat incognito, such that it is possible to snap pictures of complete strangers on the train whilst only appearing to be a modestly incompetent text-o-phobe.  With this in mind, I launch a new series of entries featuring random commuters, pedestrians, and other crazy street-people who, for whatever reason, catch my attention.  Besides, I have lost my expatriate edge to some degree and am running out of witty cultural observations - as evidenced by the increasing number of deleted posts featuring amusing anecdotes of my cat.  (I can hear people in England cheering.)

Despite the protests laid in the previous paragraph, I am still daily enamored by the school children of Australia.  Evidently, they travel vast distances each day to attend the best schools.  Each school has a distinct uniform - presumably so that if a group of them are misbehaving, you can dob them in to the appropriate headmaster.  All uniforms include a hat.  I am a big fan of hats and have amassed quite a collection of lost headgear from various institutions.  However, I cannot help but ponder the disastrous rebellion that would have ensued had uniforms been standard policy when I was a child in America. 

Can anyone who knew me as a child imagine me in that drab cotton dress??


I am pretty sure they were sending text messages to each other.

08 February 2010

Activist or Recidivist?

I found the following slip of paper in my mail box this afternoon:













I cannot help but wonder if this vitreol was targeted or random...

...or which is worse?